Antipattern: The Absentee Manager

10 August 2024

"Hey, we need to find out what happened with that purchase order for the license on our IDE. Did you Slack Bob? Did he follow up with Purchasing?" "Several times, actually. No response. Did you bring it up with him at your 1:1?" "What 1:1? He's canceled the last five." The Absentee manager is that manager that somehow never seems to be around, never seems to accomplish anything, and never seems to have any interest in their team.

Context:

The Absentee often doesn't hide from their team out of sheer incompetence, but more often than not because they are either (a) wildly overbooked with meetings and other work (often on behalf of their boss), (b) an interim manager filling in while candidates are interviewing for the open role, or (c) they lack skills (or even the confidence) to be the manager of the team. (The latter can often happen if someone is force-promoted into a management role against their wishes). Sadly, the Absentee is, by far, one of the most common managers out there, and definitely one of the worst for teams.

When the Absentee does show up, their engagement tends to be short-lived and blandly positive. "You're doing great! No complaints. Good job! Just keep doing what you're doing." and other banalities tend to make up the majority of the Absentee's feedback during 1:1s or team meetings. If pressed, the Absentee may even offer up the phrase, "You know your job better than I do, so how could anything I say help?" By offering up the self-deprecation as a compliment, the Absentee hopes to deflect any need for insight that would reveal their complete lack of perception.

Consequences:

The impact of an Absentee is often easy to predict:

Reduced progress. The team often needs someone to remove obstacles to their progress, and the lack of a manager impedes those decisions from being made, which in turn keeps the team from being able to move forward with their assigned tasks.
Employee achievements are ignored. Since the Absentee is never around or engaged with the team, any notable accomplishments or achievements realized by the team will never be discussed or promoted. In fact, it's often the case that the only time the team gets mentioned is when they miss a deadline or fail to meet expectations.
Lack of constructive feedback. Because the Absentee isn't around to see the team and how they're working (or not working) well, they lack the ability to provide any sort of constructive suggestions to improve their work.
Team member exits. If the manager remains Absentee for too long, the team members will conclude--quite rightly--that upper management isn't really all that concerned with their career development, and leave the team to find a team--and a company--that does.

Mitigation:

If you work for the Absentee. Sadly, there's not a whole lot you can do here. Waiting them out (in other words, waiting for them to be fired or quit) is often not a great strategy, because they tend to stick around--they're not overly misbehaving, but they're also not likely to gather attention and be promoted, so they're probably not going anywhere. Your best bet is to (a) look for another position, (b) barring that, keep and open line of communication and relentlessly provide them with updates and information, (c) avoid asking them for anything that isn't absolutely crucial to your work, and (d) if all else fails, take the initiative and take on tasks that normally you'd ask permission for first. "Better to ask forgiveness than permission" is a useful phrase here. If nothing else works and you don't mind taking a risk, try working around your Absentee and put ideas or initiatives directly to your skip, all the while keeping the Absentee informed of what you're doing (albeit too late for them to do anything to head it off); it has equal chances of working or getting you chided (or worse, fired).

If you manage the Absentee. Often the only sign you will get that one of your direct reports is an Absentee is when the employee surveys come through and the team members report the lack of an active manager. Verifying this will be the first step, since often the Absentee is very good at making sure that they are "present" in any interaction with their manager (that is, you). However, one additional sign of an Absentee comes when the Absentee cannot provide particular details about the team's progress, activities or concerns.

Once identified, fixing an Absentee manager is often an exercise in getting them to "show up" for their team:

Train them. If the Absentee genuinely feels they have no skills to add to the team, then the first step will be getting them to admit it, followed by actionable steps to correct for it. Their concern may be over technical skills--remind them that they are there to manage, not be the best on the team at everything. Their concern might instead center on their inability to navigate human drama--obtain for them classes around negotiation or even psychology or sociology. And so on. Ruthlessly pursue what they feel they lack, and counter by providing them the opportunity to gain those skills.
Hold them accountable to their necessary actions. Make their execution of their managerial duties a formal part of their day-to-day activities. Review their team member performance notes in 1:1s. Ensure they have proper agendas for their team-wide and individual 1:1 meetings. Require day-to-day updates of their activities and meetings to ensure they are putting in the necessary time with the team if necessary. Whatever it takes, make it clear that their first priority is to this team and its success.
Verify they are following through on team-level 1:1s. The most important meeting a manager can have is 1:1s with their team members, so the best way to make sure the Absentee is "showing up" is to ensure they are meeting with their team on a regular basis. You can do this through a variety of mechanisms, including inserting yourself into meetings periodically as a "spot check", but make sure to connect with your HR team to make sure you're not crossing lines of privacy--usually you can't force yourself into their email to see if they're canceling meetings, for example.
Enforce skip-level 1:1s. By meeting with the Absentee's team members on a regular cadence, you'll be able to triangulate the activities of the Absentee and make sure they're following through on being present. It will also help you make sure that team accomplishments and achievements can get recognized, even if the Absentee doesn't.

If you are the Absentee. If you recognize you're the Absentee, and you want to stop, the key is self-evaluation--what is preventing you from showing up? If it's a skills issue, it's on you to rectify. Immediately go to your boss and self-report your Absentee ways, explain why you feel inadequate and up to the task, and ask for some support in getting the skills that you need. More importantly, self-report to your team. "I'm sorry I haven't been showing up lately, I just feel like I'm not sure how to help. What do you need me to do?" Make sure to follow up with what they need, and if you aren't sure how to do that, reach out to your boss and/or your peers to find out how they handle it.

Tags: management antipatterns