10 August 2024
"Hi, team, my name is Charles, and I'm going to be taking over this team, as a favor to Biff. You know, your CTO? Excellent. So... what is you all do here?" It is not uncommon, particularly in smaller companies (especially startups) for a team to find themselves being led by a close acquaintance or (more often) "buddy" of someone in the CxO suite.
Context:
Decent. The Buddy is often not a terrible person, nor are they deeply unqualified to run the team. Although there are certainly cases where the C-Buddy is, in fact, entirely incompetent, most of the time these folks are of similar skill level and stature as the CTO themselves, and while the litany of flaws in a CTO may be long, most incompetent CTOs don't last long.
Affable. Most Buddies are at least a little bit charming, as it seems to run common in the circles. Most Buddies are aware that they are being "dropped in" to a team based on their connections, and thus will be more atuned to the idea of "playing nice" for a while, making it as easy as possible to get along with them, until such time that they have to take a stand on something.
Borrowed credibility. Unless the Buddy has their own history and reputation, they will be borrowing heavily against the credibility of their connection as they get started. They may even reference it outright, using it as a form of Appeal to Authority if necessary.
Mismatched experience. If the Buddy does have experience with running teams, it is very likely it is from a wildly different industry and/or context: the former health-care CTO steps in to run a team in a video-game company, or vice versa. "How different is it, really?" is a common phrase heard in these situations.
CxO Desire. The Buddy's buddy (the CxO who asked them to take on the team) generally "really wants this to work", for a wide variety of reasons that cna range from simple comraderie ("I've always wanted to work together!") to
Consequences:
Variants:
The Nepotist Manager. The new manager isn't a buddy of the CxOs, they're a family member--brother, sister, son, daughter, or some other kind of familial relationship. In the parent-child case, the parent may be looking to get the child some "hands-on experience" in the company, as a way of getting them ready to "take over the business". In the sibling (or cousin) case, it may be a favor to the sibling, such as an attempt at helping the sibling execute a "career pivot". Either way, getting the CxO to listen to criticism of the Buddy/Nepotist will be that much more difficult, as the CxO has more at stake (personally and emotionally). (If the Buddy is the spouse of the CxO, this borders on the very definition of Really Bad Idea, and HR should probably step in.)
The Romantic Manager. The new manager isn't a buddy of the CxOs, they're a romantic partner or paramour. This is nepotism/cronyism at its worst, and most companies have explicit policies against this sort of thing--when they're aware of it. Here your options are generally paired up with legal action and/or anonymous whistleblowing, and all the mess that comes with that.
Mitigation:
If you work for the Buddy. First, expect that the Buddy will open with a strong charm campaign--they know they're there because of their connections, and they will want to try and build out some relationships of their own fairly quickly. This can range from casual compliments ("Nice work!") to full-blown team parties ("Hey, let's go catch a happy hour somewhere, my treat!").
After that, though, things can get dicey fast. Depending on the Buddy's actual level of skill, this can go "good enough" (they make reasonable decisions) to "augering in fast" (they make bad decisions or worse). At this point, your options become:
Play the game. The CxOs Buddy is going to have regular conversations with their friend, and could turn into a vector by which you yourself start getting some "face time" with the CxO directly. You don't have to turn into a pushover or become an outright brown-noser, but if the opportunity arises to go with the Buddy to lunch with the CxO, take it! Spend the first lunch or two just listening and asking questions. But, also, be prepared for the CxO to ask direct questions of you about the project, the mood of the company, or even their Buddy's management style. Spend a few minutes thinking about what you would want to say (or how you would want to deflect) in the event those questions come up. Worst case, come up with a few variations on the answer, "I admit, I had some reservations when it started, but the signs have been positive thus far, and while I'm still witholding any final judgment, I'm eager to see how it'll all turn out."
Give them a chance. Many of the CxO suite are friends for a reason, and it's often because they've found peers who have operated at the same level as they. In some cases, one friend may have jumped into management while the other remained technical, and so on, but if your CxO is competent (and be honest in your assessment of them), then there's a reasonable chance the Buddy will be, too.
Document everything. The CxO's desire for the Buddy to succeed is not going to get any smaller, and if the Buddy makes some bad decisions that generate bad press (either internally or externally), the CxO and Buddy may start looking for scapegoats to preserve the CxO's credibility. (Remember, the Buddy is borrowing against the CxO's cred.) If the Buddy asks you to do something (or stop doing something) that you think will lead to some kind of disaster (big or small), document it. Keep the email trail, take screenshots of the Slack window, whatever is convenient and handy. It may not stop you from being fired, but if the company is big enough and the failure loud enough, your documentation could very well become a bargaining chip; it can mean the difference between a "for-cause" termination and a potential severance package to go with it.
If you are the Buddy. Recognize you're on borrowed credibility. Accept this statement in your heart right now: You didn't "earn" this position, it was "given" to you. It doesn't matter whether you are actually qualified (or even over-qualified) for the role, the perception everyone will have is that it was gifted to you from your CxO pal. Unlike other new-hires, you will be starting with nearly zero credibility. Therefore:
Spend the first three months asking questions, and making no statements. Earn some cred by asking thoughtful questions, taking copious notes, and reviewing your notes every night after work until you can catch yourself silently answering others' questions (in your head, not out loud!) before others do.
Establish a "TeamNDA". Make it clear to your team that ou do not spend day after day gossiping about the team to your CxO pal. The team needs to know they're not under a microscope, or they will get exhausted from the (perception of) pressure.
Establish work/friend boundaries. Talk to your CxO pal and establish some boundaries that work for you: No talking about work during non-work meetings, for example, and an absolute prohibition on any team gossip.
Defend your team to the CxO in a public forum. This is one of the best ways to earn some cred from the team, assuming the "defense" is a reasonable one. It will also help establish your working relationship with your CxO pal, in that they will have to accept that you aren't going to agree with them all the time. Be careful if your CxO pal isn't used to you arguing with them like this, however, and make sure it's not in so public a forum that their reputation and credibility is hurt with the company as a whole--friendships have been drowned in the hurt that comes with a wrongly-timed public retelling of a private story.
If the Buddy works for you. This is, literally, the worst of the three situations--you're very likely to be in what feels to be a "squeeze" play, wherein the Buddy is friends with your boss, and you're going to feel like you're not in a position to disagree with the Buddy unless you're ready to go to the mat with your CxO in turn. What's worse, your suspicions may be correct: the CxO may want the Buddy to step into your role, despite the sleaziness of the maneuver, so that they can work more closely together.
If the CxO talked to you about this before it happened, give it a chance. There's every possibility that the CxO has the best of intentions at heart, and simply wants their Buddy in the role because it feels like a great fit or a necessary pairing of expertise to need. As a trial, talk to the CxO about something the Buddy is doing that you disagree with, and see how the CxO reacts--if they wave off and say "It's your team", there's a strong chance they aren't trying to cut you out of the loop. If they take a strong stance on what the Buddy is thinking or doing, however, and this repeats itself a few times, you should probably start thinking of exit strategies, because regardless of what the CxO is saying, their actions make it clear that they align with what the Buddy is saying and doing, and it's only a matter of time before you're seen as an obstacle to progress.
If the CxO didn't talk to you about this before it happened, red alert! Any CxO who cannot spot ahead of time what a wierd spot this puts you into is probably not a particularly compassionate or psychologically safe manager. Decide if you want to play the game, but even if you do, document everything and prepare your exit strategy. You might even steal a march on the situation by approaching your CxO and offering to step aside for the Buddy to step into your role, IF the CxO can get you that promotion into the other department you're craving or is willing to send you off with a generous severance package. It's even possible that making the offer will take the CxO off-guard, bring them to realize what they've done to you and how it could look bad for them, and get them to re-establish some healthy boundaries. But I wouldn't bet on it.
Chat with HR. If the company is large enough, a conversation with the HR department might be in order. They may not be able to prevent your separation or termination, but they will be much more aware of the legal implications of what the CxO is doing, and could very well press for a lateral-slide-move for you into a new role rather than losing your job entirely. (Of course, it's equally possible that the HR department will take no action--in which case you're really no worse off than before.)